Raine

"So will I. You have to eat and you're going to. Now come on," I said and put the spoon up to her lips. She didn't open her mouth and I sighed. "Raine, we're serious, don't make us force you." She finally opened her mouth and I fed her a bite.

"Thank you. Please keep eating."

She didn't say anything, and I went slow, feeding her bite after bite until the food was gone.



"I'm gonna be sick," I whispered and tried to get up off the bed.



"Don't even think about it," I said, wrapping my arms around her and holding her in my lap. "Fight it Raine. You have to keep that food in you."

"You aren't leaving this room until it's gone and you've held it down for awhile."

"Let... let me... go... please," I sobbed out, trying to fight my way out of her arms, but I was weak.



"We're not going anywhere, and neither are you."

"Stop struggling and eat or I'll hold you myself."

"There's... nothing left... on the fucking... plate just... leave me... alone, leave me alone," I sobbed out.
 

"Fuck that. I've left you alone long enough, everyone has. It hasn't done you a damn bit of good."

"Neither is... is this," I sobbed out and took a deep breath when my stomach rolled. Please don't let me throw up on them.... God that would be humiliating.

I took her face in my hands and made her look at me "Why are you crying, baby? Stop. Stop crying so you can hold down your dinner. The thrashing around isn't helping either. Calm down."

"I... I c... can't," I sobbed out, my body starting to shake. I felt like I couldn't breathe and all I wanted was to take something sharp to any part of me I could reach... I couldn't take feeling like this anymore... I was going over the edge and I didn't know how to stop...
 

"Yes you can. You can stop." I told her sternly. God, I felt like such a dick but what was I supposed to do? Let her die. No way in hell.

"Come on Raine, calm down. You need to calm down, you're gonna throw yourself into a panic attack. Come on now hon, deep breaths, come on now."

"Breathe, Raine. Just breathe."

"I don't... want to," I whispered and leaned my head on his chest, my body still shaking.

"That's the only choice you have."

"This isn't... a choice... you're making me," I whispered, feeling utterly defeated. "If you love me... you'll let me go.... I can't do this anymore Gabe... I can't..."



"Stop... stop it Raine... Just stop. Please."

"I'm sorry but I can't let you go like this.I could never do that." 

She started to sob harder, her sobs shaking her, but she eventually settled down. I could tell how exhausted she was, and it wasn't long before she was asleep. I searched her room from top to bottom, finding two knives hidden away, and slid them into my boot before sitting back down. "She needs help..." I said, stating the obvious. "God I had no idea.... Does anyone else know?"
 

I shook my head and sighed "I don't think so."

"We need to tell... someone. I just don't know who. Quin would..." I whistled low. "Flip the fuck out I think about covers it."

"It probably doesn't cover it enough to be honest."

"Probably not. And can you imagine Selma?" I shook my head. "I don't know what to do here. I mean... I was bad but... not this bad. I don't know how to deal with this."

"Who could help us with her situation? Do you know anyone?"

"I don't know of any male but Asher, and he's had so much going on lately. I don't know if she would talk to him about it or not. Maybe Pepper...? I have no idea," I said and sighed heavily.